This iconic photo of Bill Wilson gazing at Dr. Bob’s grave was taken by Mel B. on Founders Day in 1958. You can read the story behind it by clicking on the photo.

Mel B. is our special Speaker this coming Sunday, January 13^th, 2013 at our weekly Step Workshop Meeting! Mel B. got sober on April 15, 1950 and is the foremost historian on Alcoholics Anonymous. He has had an illustrious career. Mel is the author of 20 recovery based books and has almost 70 published articles in the Grapevine.

As a personal friend of Bill W. and many of the AA pioneers, Mel had a birds-eye view into the development of Alcoholics Anonymous. Mel B. is the principle author of the only authorized biography and general conference approved book about Bill W. “Pass It On”. His books include recovery classics such as  “New Wine: The Spiritual Roots of the 12 Step Miracle”, “Walk in Dry Places”, and “Ebby: The Man Who Sponsored Bill W. “

His latest book “Living the 12 Traditions in Todays World: Principles Over Personalities” examines the evolution of the 12 Traditions and their importance in the success and survival of Alcoholics Anonymous and the 12 Step organizations.

You may read many of his Grapevine article online at his website “WalkInDryPlaces.com”. You will find his Grapevine articles engaging and thought provoking. You may also order personally autographed copies of his books from his website. Just send an email to melb AT accesstoledo.com  to place your order.

Everyone will have a chance to ask Mel B. questions about Bill W. , the Steps or his books at the Step Workshop Meeting next Sunday.  So get your questions ready and email them to us. Our email address is:  guides AT stepworkshop DOT COM

Looking forward to seeing everyone next Sunday!

In fellowship,

12 Step Guides

Skype Us: Stepworkshop

Tweet Us: @Stepworkshop

Email Us: guides At step workshop DOT COM
 

It’s that time of the year again…time to welcome new people into the Step Workshop meetings! Congratulations and a special welcome to all the new participants in the Step Workshop.  You are in for the Grand Adventure of your life! What a great way to start the New Year!

The Step Workshop is based on the 12 Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous and accepts members from all fellowships including NA, CA, Alanon, OA, SA, SLAA, GA, to name a few. We recognize that alcohol is but one symptom of our disease and that our disease changes just like we change.

When we enter recovery, many of us put down the bottle that has the label that says “Alcohol” or “Money” or “Food” and pick up another bottle with a different label on it.  Then we hit another bottom and find ourselves having to surrender and change our playmates, playgrounds, and playthings again and again. For some of us, the cycle becomes endless. Chasing something or someone: alcohol, drugs, relationships, work, money, sex, food, gambling, becomes a way of life for us. There is a way out. We have found it. And you can too.  It’s called working a Program of Recovery.

For anyone wishing to join, we are only accepting participants for the Sunday 11:00am EST Group. You may attend our Step Workshop meetings via Skype or by telephone.  You will need to register at the stepworkshop.com website, or go here to register.  When you register, please remember to type in your Skype name or telephone number and email address.  If you don’t type in your Skype name or telephone number then we have no way of calling you when the meeting begins. Our Skype name is “stepworkshop” (we try to keep everything real simple). Then send us a Contact Request on Skype, so we can call you when the Step Workshop meeting begins.

If you have any questions about Skype or the Step Workshop in general, you may email us directly: guides AT stepworkshop DOT COM.

In love and service,

12 Step Guides

New StepWorkShop Groups begin in September 2012! The next StepWorkShop groups begin in September 2012! There will be four new groups:

1. Women’s StepWorkShop group meets on Friday, 9:00pm EDT
2. Beginner’s StepworkShop group meets on Saturday, 12:00pm EDT
3. Regular StepWorkShop group meets on Sunday, 11:00 am EDT
4. Men’s Stepworkshop meets on Sunday, 1:00pm EDT

You will need to register to reserve your space. Please note, group size is limited, in fairness to everyone, availability will be on a first come basis. To register go  to our website  at StepWorkShop.com or  click here: http://stepworkshop.com/twelve-step-workshop-program-of-recovery/

After you register you will receive a confirmation email from us with detailed information on your group, including our telephone number where you may call us directly.

All of our meetings are hosted via Skype but you may also participate via telephone (landline or mobile ) if you prefer. Skype accounts are free! You can sign up for a Skype account here http://skype.com. Once you have a Skype account, just click on “Add a Contact” and type in our name “stepworkshop” to find us. Then send us a Contact Request and you’re done! Make sure you are logged into your Skype account every week when the meeting begins so we can call you.

Or if you prefer to participate by telephone without using Skype or being on the internet, please email us: guides AT stepworkshop DOT COM with your telephone number, so we can conference call you into the StepWorkshop meetings.

Contact us directly on skype or email us if you have any questions. We look forward to meeting you!

In fellowship,
StepWorkShop Guides

Email: guides AT stepworkshop DOT com
twitter.com/StepWorkShop
Skype Name: StepWorkShop

Why the “no sex in first year” ban in recovery? The no sex in the first year suggestion for single newcomers is probably the most unpopular and controversial suggestion, but is important to follow for several reasons.

1. The biggest concern is relapse. In the first year of recovery we go thru tremendous change adapting to our new way of life.  We experience massive transformation on every level: physical, emotional and mental. It’s not wise to subject oneself to the additional stress and drama of a new sexual relationship. We can try to rationalize our behavior by calling it sport sex, comfort sex, buddy sex, anonymous sex, or friends-with-benefits, but it’s still sex. And it has consequences. Relationship break-ups can be incredibly painful and emotionally devastating. The emotional pain of a break-up, particularly in early sobriety, can be overwhelming and can easily trigger a relapse. Is it really fair to put our recovery in such danger? If our partner is also in recovery, how fair is it to them?  Nothing and no one is worth losing our sobriety.

2. We can’t give away what we don’t have to give. We need to have a healthy, loving relationship with our self, first, before we can have healthy, loving relationships with others. We cannot experience true love with others, until we are able to accept and love ourself first.  We have to be able to treat ourselves with compassion, understanding, acceptance, respect and forgiveness. These are inner qualities that we begin to develop and practice in the Steps. Recovery is in the Steps.

3. Relationships are a great distraction from our real work: sobriety. Few things are as mind-altering as entering into a new sexual relationship, especially if it’s an illicit relationship. The secrecy alone is exciting and intoxicating! Our new partners often become our “Higher Power.” Then it’s easy for us to place our new relationship before our recovery.  Getting lost in the giddiness and excitement of a new relationship is highly effective in helping us avoid doing the inner work necessary for emotional growth and stability. But when the latest infatuation ends, the work still remains to be done. Our focus needs to remain self-based and on our self-care. Feeling is healing and healing is in the Steps.

The one-year time period of no sexual relations for single newcomers is only a suggestion. Some members may not need to abstain for that long, while others may need much more than a year before they are well enough to have intimate relations.

We all entered the rooms with low-to-no self-esteem, loaded down with feelings of shame and unworthiness. In recovery, we learn that it’s important to go into a relationship as a whole person — not as a needy person looking outside ourselves for someone to make us whole. The more you learn to like and love yourself, the more you will be able to like and love others.

How will you know if the time is right for you to begin an intimate relationship?  You may want to ask yourself several questions such as:

Have you completed the 12 Steps? Have you become your own best friend? Would you want to have someone like yourself as a partner? If you are able to answer yes to these questions, then you may be ready to enter into a healthy, fulfilling intimate relationship. If you’re not sure, you may want to discuss it with a sponsor, health care professional or a clergyperson.

In our early days of sobriety we get to discover who we really are, not the person we want others to think we are, and not the person we want to think we are. We get to discover the person we really, truly are.  Many of us have never done that before. It requires awareness, acceptance, respect, compassion, forgiveness and love for oneself. Most of all it requires time. Accepting the suggestion of no sex in the first year provides the vulnerable newcomer with the time and the safe space necessary to begin their journey into wellness.

Top 10 AA Recovery Books

Our top 10 recovery books on alcoholism. Most are best-selling classics in the AA recovery community. Some recovery books are featured in the Reading Assignments at the Step Workshop. Newcomers will find this top 10 list of AA recovery books particularly useful. Drum roll please:

1. Alcoholics Anonymous: The Big Book, 4th Edition by Anonymous: The primary textbook that started it all and is the model for all the 12 Step fellowship programs. The Big Book has transformed countless lives and has been like a “bible” for the recovery community since it was first published in 1939. The fourth edition contains 24 new personal stories in addition to the stories of AA’s pioneers and the original 164 pages of recovery instructions for alcoholics. It can be read online for free and found here.
2. Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions by Alcoholics Anonymous: Also known as the “12 and 12” this is a must-have reference book for understanding and working the 12 Steps. The book is helpful to all members of a 12 Step fellowship as it provides an in-depth study of each Step and the Traditions. The 12 and 12 can be read online for free and found here.
3. The Little Red Book by Anonymous: Excellent reference and study guide of the 12 Steps. Authored by Dr. Bob S., the co-founder of AA, along with early AAer’s from Minneapolis, MN.
4. Twenty Four Hours a Day by Anonymous and Daily Reflections: A Book of Reflections by A.A.: These are great daily meditations and companion books to the primary texts. Many in the recovery community begin their day with these daily meditation books.
5. Living Sober by Anonymous: The first recovery book that many of us read. Full of practical suggestions for newcomers or anyone who wants to learn how to live life sober. Highly recommend reading for everyone, especially newcomers.
6. Came to Believe by A.A. Services: Poignant short stories by numerous AA members of self-discovery in their spiritual journey. This book has become a favorite in the recovery community.
7. Search for Serenity and How to Achieve It by Lewis F. Presnall: Wonderful book about emotional growth and how to turn misery into serenity. Full of practical guidance to help anyone going thru challenging or painful times in their life.
8. Sermon on the Mount: The Key to Success in Life by Emmett Fox: Contains powerful and inspirational messages for spiritual and character development.
9. A Woman’s Guide to Recovery by Brenda Lliff: An excellent guidebook for women or men in recovery. This book will help anyone who wants to better understand everything from the recovery process, to the 12 Step Program with practical suggestions on how to apply the Program in your every day life.
10. Undrunk: A Skeptics Guide to AA by A.J. Adams: Humorous book that describes the authors’ introduction to the recovery process and his first year of sobriety. Highly recommended for newcomers or anyone who would like to learn about the 12 Step program.

And one of my personal favorite recovery books: Recovery is a Wonderland. An inspirational story of how recovery from alcoholism, drug addiction, and abusive relationships is possible thru the 12 Step program. This ebook was recently published. You can download it for free here.

This top 10 list is our selection of “must-haves” and only covers recovery books on alcoholism. What recovery books on alcoholism are in your top 10 list?

Lincoln Temperance Address

Did you know that Abraham Lincoln was a member of his local Washingtonian Temperance Society? A life-long teetotaler, Lincoln was a prominent advocate for the Springfield, Illinois Society of Washingtonians.

On February 22^nd, 1842, Lincoln delivered a controversial address before the Springfield Washingtonian Society from the lectern of the Second Presbyterian Church. In his speech, Lincoln criticized preachers, lawyers and hired agents for having either ulterior motives or for using improper tactics such as threats of damnation in their vain attempts to reform drunkards. These criticisms from the pulpit did not go over well with said preachers, lawyers and hired agents.

Meanwhile Lincoln extolled the recent success of the Washingtonians and addressed the reasons for it:

That that success is so much greater now than heretofore, is doubtless owing to rational causes; and if we would have it continue, we shall do well to inquire what those causes are.

He claimed that a major reason the Washingtonians met with success in helping drunkards reform came from their ability to identify and to share their experiences with each other. Or as we would say today, the strength of the sharing and caring found in fellowship:

But when one who has long been known as a victim of intemperance bursts the fetters that have bound him, and appears before his neighbors “clothed and in his right mind,” a redeemed specimen of long-lost humanity, and stands up with tears of joy trembling in his eyes, to tell of the miseries once endured, now to be endured no more forever, of his once naked and starving children, now clad and fed comfortably, of a wife, long weighed down with woe, weeping, and a broken heart, now restored to health, happiness and a renewed affection, and how easily it is all done, once it is resolved to be done; how simple his language ; there is a logic and an eloquence in it that few with human feelings can resist. They cannot say that he desires a union of church and state, for he is not a church-member; they cannot say he is vain of hearing himself speak, for his whole demeanor shows he would gladly avoid speaking at all ; they cannot say he speaks for pay, for he receives none, and asks for none. Nor can his sincerity in any way be doubted, or his sympathy for those he would persuade to imitate his example be denied.

Lincoln also cited other reasons: reliance upon each other and the hope that together all can become reformed drinkers.

By the Washingtonians, this system of consigning the habitual drunkard to hopeless ruin, is repudiated. They adopt a more enlarged philanthropy. They go for present as well as future good. They labor for all now living, as well as all hereafter to live. They teach hope to all — despair to none.

Sound familiar?  You can read the complete speech here: Lincoln Temperance Address

We are ready to begin the next online 12 Stepworkshop groups! There will be two new groups starting in September.

One 12 Stepworkshop group will meet every Friday at 8:00pm EST/New York City time and will begin on Friday, September 23rd .

The other 12 Stepworkshop group will meet every Sunday at 11:00am EST/New York City time and will start meeting on Sunday, September 25th.

We have a third Al-Anon Stepworkshop group that will begin in October, exact date and time to be announced soon.

You will need to register to reserve your space. Please note, group size is limited, so in fairness to everyone, availability will be on a first come basis.

All of our meetings are hosted via skype but you may also participate via telephone (landline or mobile) if you prefer. Skype accounts are free! You can sign up for a skype account here http://skype.com. Once you have a Skype account, just click on “Add a Contact” and type in our name “stepworkshop” to find us. Then send us a Contact Request and you’re done! Just make sure to be logged into your skype account every week when the meeting begins so we can connect with you.

Or if you prefer to participate by telephone without using skype, please email us (guides@stepworkshop.com) with the best phone number to reach you, so we can conference call you into the StepWorkshop meetings.

Call us directly on skype or email us if you have any questions. We hope to meet you soon!

In fellowship,
Stepworkshop Guides

Email: guides AT stepworkshop DOT com
Skype Name: stepworkshop

Photo by orvaratli at flickr.com

Step Two of the 12 Steps of AA
“Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.”

Exercise One

In Step Two, we begin to develop the spiritual principle of hope. You will find the Introduction to Step Two along with its key words and concepts here.

The exercises for this week present opportunities to experience hope and to find miracles in our life. The exercises for hope can be found here and the exercises for miracles can be found here.

In addition to the practice exercises, we will review our Stepwork from Paths to Recovery and this weeks’ speaker tape.

Listen to following Speaker Tape:

AA Speakers Scott and Bob on Step 2 in 12 Step Series

The Stepworkshop Groups began on January 9, 2011. To start at the beginning of this Stepworkshop series, please go here.

To do ALL the assignments and exercises with complete instructions, you must register and attend our online Stepworkshop. Go here to register.

Everyone from the recovery community is welcome to share their thoughts on the speaker tapes or with working Step One. Please share your experience, strength and hope with us in the Comments sections below.

Lest we forget:
*Hope is the spiritual principle we practice in the Step Two.
*Continue to do your Daily Checklist at the end of each day.
*Perk your ears up and listen closely to for the key words believe, restore, sanity insanity and hoped discussed at meetings.
*At meetings, share about your experience with Step Two.

The Stepworkshop Groups began on January 9, 2011. To start at the beginning of this Stepworkshop series, please go here. To do ALL the assignments and exercises with complete instructions, you must register and attend our online Stepworkshop. Go here to register.

Everyone from the recovery community is welcome to share their thoughts on the speaker tapes or with working Step One. Please share your experience, strength and hope with us in the Comments sections below.

Photo by kuzeytac at flickr.com

Step One of the 12 Steps of AA
“We admitted we were powerless over alcohol – that our lives had become unmanageable.”

In this weeks’ exercise, we see that we are the problem and not other people, places, things, circumstances and events in the external world. We discover that we are the only problem we have and need new management to change. Happiness truly is an inside job.

1. In your own words, define:

a. Unmanageability
b. Surrender

2. Unmanageability: Spend no more than two hours working on this exercise. Finish as soon as possible. Think back to when you were a little kid. Remember the first thing you wanted that would make everything all right. Then remember the next thing you wanted that would make everything fine. Remember each instance when finding someone or something would make everything just fine. Do it in chronological order, from the very beginning. Only put down things you got, only write down things that happened.

Listen to following Speaker Tapes:

AA 12 Steps Speakers Joe and Charlie –Step 1

AA 12 Steps Speaker: Sister Bea

AA 12 Steps Speaker: June G.

The Stepworkshop Groups began on January 9, 2011. To start at the beginning of this Stepworkshop series, please go here. To do ALL the assignments and exercises with complete instructions, you must register and attend our online Stepworkshop. Go here to register.

Everyone from the recovery community is welcome to share their thoughts on the speaker tapes or with working Step One. Please share your experience, strength and hope with us in the Comments sections below.

Lest we forget:
*Honesty is the spiritual principle we practice in Step One.
**Honesty is the ability to be honest with yourself.
***Perk your ears up and listen closely to First Step concepts and key words during discussions meetings.
****At meetings, share about your experience with the First Step and its core principle honesty.

Photo by Stepworkshop.com

Step 1 of the 12 Steps of AA
“We admitted we were powerless over alcohol – that our lives had become unmanageable.”

The core spiritual principle that we begin to practice and develop in Step 1 is honesty. The exercises this week will give us an opportunity to look at how well we demonstrate honesty in all areas of our life.

Honesty is the foundation of emotional sobriety.

Serenity is the gift we receive from being honest.

1. In your own words, define:

a. Honesty
b. Dishonesty

2. Every evening write down every lie you told that day. Then spend 5 to 10 minutes thinking about honesty. Ask yourself these questions:

a. What reason did I tell the lies I told?
b. Was it really that important?
c. What does the word honesty really mean to me?

Listen to following Speaker Tapes:

AA 12 Steps Speaker Anne Marie –Step 1 – Honesty

and

Alanon Speaker: Mary Pearl 5th tape in 12 Steps Series

and

AA 12 Steps Speaker Earl H. – Celebrate the Buzz

The Stepworkshop Groups began on January 9, 2011. To start at the beginning of this Stepworkshop series, please go here. To do ALL the assignments and exercises with complete instructions, you must register and attend our online Stepworkshop. Go here to register.

Everyone from the recovery community is welcome to share their thoughts on the speaker tapes or with working Step One. Please share your experience, strength and hope with us in the Comments sections below.

Lest we forget:
*Honesty is the spiritual principle we practice in Step One.
**Honesty is the ability to be honest with yourself.
***Perk your ears up and listen closely to First Step concepts and key words during discussions meetings.
****At meetings, share about your experience with the First Step and its core principle honesty.